Oh..... Deer!

Well.. Today kind of sucked. I mean- I'll be honest with you, because I strive to always be honest. Monday, December 3rd, I hit a buck. A HUGE ASS BUCK. I was driving home with my friend, and didn't see it at all! Literally, I never believed when people would say "it came out of no where!" I always thought.. Yeeeeahhhh- right, and the sky is orange! But in all honesty- this stupid creature came out of no where! One minute, Robin and I are talking, the next- BAM! SLAM! THANK YOU MA'AM! Crushed hood, destroyed grill- DONZO. What makes matters worse.. Is that I have already crashed my sisters car, and got a $90 speeding ticket.. Racking ^^^ my parents insurance up the wazoo! So telling my dad about it broke my heart.. Then, my step-brother whom I share the car with accused me of texting and driving- which in all reality I normally do! But since I had a passenger who wasn't a family member I had my phone tucked away! However, Robin told Josh that I had been texting. Which really made me feel terrible and embarrassed.. I know she didn't mean any harm by telling him.. But I really hadn't been texting- so it just made me furious and defensive. Which made me incredibly emotional-- especially with my current state of instability! Ugh, anyway.. I was already on the verge of tears when I was walking down the hall.. and I said hi to Todd, like I usually do, and he replies "hey, beautiful," and I don't know why! But by heck- I had to literally bite my tongue to hold back tears. It was just something tiny that lifted my spirits in to a more heightened emotional state! Gosh! I am a wreck.. any who, I went to drama.. multiple people asked if I was ok, but I just kinda shook my head without a reply.. Thankfully singing pulled me out of my slump a little and I was able to make it through the day without my tears brimming over. It meant a lot to me that people who aren't even really my close friends had noticed that my inner light was diminished and did their best to cheer me up. I really am surrounded by a great group of people.. It made my heart swell to see them reach out to me. I am going to try hard to find one thing that I am really thankful for in each day, in hopes of lifting my spirits to where they need to be. I hope that everyone out there might be able to do the same.. I encourage you to- it just might help? Guess we'll see! Release some of our inner venom.. But question? If I get rid of my venom.. where will it go? Store in a small box waiting for my really dark days?
Guess there is only way to find out... Good luck everyone. xoxo